For A Good Marriage, Have Sex Even If You Aren't In The Mood | YourTango

For A Good Marriage, Have Sex Even If You Aren't In The Mood | YourTango: "Ladies, I hear you. Please take a moment to calmly breathe, take another sip of your coffee/wine and read on before you congregate on my front lawn with picketing signs.

I recently wrote an article, 5 Mistakes I Make as a Wife (And You Probably Do, Too), and one of my faults is not making time for my husband in the sexual department. I received many positive comments and emails regarding the article, but it made some women incredibly angry that I had the audacity to insinuate that a woman should put her husband's desires before her own.

Because, apparently, selfishness is a horrible thing unless we are talking about sex.  

Sex isn't solely about you, woman. Let that sink in. If you have a good man (as I do) who values, loves, respects and honors you in every way, then there is absolutely nothing wrong in giving him what only you can offer—even if you'd rather sleep, watch television, pin recipes or play Candy Crush.

Simply, it's called putting other's needs before your own, and yes, I use the term "needs" because that's exactly what they are.

Sex is a real physical need for men that women just don't have.

It's not my opinion. It's science.

Women do not have a biological drive for sex. We want sex based on hormones that fluctuate due to our reproductive cycle, our emotions and the hypothalamus in our delicate female brains. We just don't need sex in the same way that our men require it.

This doesn't mean we are completely lacking a libido or that sex isn't a wonderful and mandatory part of our lives. It simply means that we don’t have as much testosterone as men (but just enough to trigger the growth of that chin hair). 

I didn't fully understand this until I heard the following comparison:  

When I was breastfeeding, I felt annoying pain and discomfort when the milk built up. I had to release it before I turned into the Hulk and went on a rampage. This need for release is quite similar to the need that a man feels when he is chocked full of semen. With sex, we don't have a buildup that demands release. Men certainly do.

Again, it's not just some crazy submissive opinion. It's science."



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